A time for Gratitude

I apologize for the gap in posting time, the past few months have been quite a journey for our community. We went from Rosh Hashana, to Simchat Torah, celebrating with one another, but missing almost a month of school. As soon as we got back into the groove, the Tree of Life shooting happened and we were turned upside down as we tried to deal with a lot of questions, emotions and feelings. And then suddenly it was November and we had a Thanksgiving program to put together and another week out of classes. Don’t blink, because by the time you finish reading this, it’s probably going to be December and the winter holidays will be upon us.

One topic that always seems to come up around this time of year is gratitude and how can we help our children be grateful and thankful. This is especially timely since many of us celebrate gift giving holidays in the winter time, and children (and adults too) can get caught up in the ‘more stuff’ mindset. How can you help your child during these times and throughout the year?

1. Model thankfulness and appreciativeness. Make sure your child is hearing you say your thank you’s when someone gives you something. Let them know when you notice they've done something (Wow! You put away the shoes for me. I appreciate that so much, now I have a little extra time to spend with you!). These little people want to be like us!
2. Share the things you’re thankful and grateful for. It’s not just for the Thanksgiving table! Every night at our house we ask a question that can’t be answered with a yes/no. Some questions you could ask: What’s something good that happened to you today? What are you thankful for today? What did you do nice for someone today? If they have a negative response, help them to find the positive to go along with it.
3. Talk about others. No, not that way. Talk about the people that might not have everything that you do and how you can help them. Set aside some time for G'milut Chasidim. G'milut Chasidim is the ways that we can perform acts of loving kindness by giving your self or your time, with out expecting anything in return. I know some people that keep kits in their cars that they can give to people that they see that are homeless. Visit an elderly neighbor who hasn't been feeling well. There are many places that your children can donate their unwanted toys to. Talk about the people in their daily lives and all the things that they do for us, from their busdriver to the trashman to the police officer, and do something nice for them. 
4. Set expectations for the ‘stuff’. I’ve known families that clean out their toys/clothes/books right before the holidays. Yes, it’s making room for more, but it’s also teaching about giving and sharing. Talk about shopping trips ahead of time and how it might just be a “look” trip. One of the bloggers that I follow fights the “I wants” by letting her child hold the item that they want and snapping a picture of them with it, creating a photographic wishlist. Often, she said, her kid forgets about it completely!

Here are some resources so that you can read more about gratitude and young children:
10 Ways to Raise a Grateful Kid
Nurturing Gratitude
8 Ways to Teach Kids Gratitude

Here are some groups and organizations that you can help out with donations:
Foster Love (I only linked their donation page, but they have a bag drive going on through December 15)
Play it Forward Pittsburgh (They are collecting donations now and through December 12. They encourage entire families, including children, to volunteer!)
North Hills Community Outreach (They have a variety of programs and volunteer opportunities)